Wednesday, September 28, 2016
Yee Barh Huo
With a vengeance, I have chased down half burnt bridges and torched them for this is the juncture in my life where I need to do this.
Thursday, September 22, 2016
the inconsequential read (the circle of life)
The start-
It has been ages since I have had the time and the mental clarity to think about what I am doing, and more importantly, where I am headed. I just spent a weekend with the parents, and I decided that that was by far one of the hardest things that I do, and also, one of the hardest things that I have not yet accomplished. As hopeless as that sounds, I think that the reason that am unable to move on is that though I do not remember as well as others, I understand the reason as to why people do things. And on top of that, if they do not have a reason to do the things that they do, I assign them the most probable reason that they might have had. In turn, considering that most people do not have reasons to act the way that they do, naturally they are assigned the worst possible reason. That said, there are many who have crossed my path that this does not hold true for. Some are just fucked up pure and simple, while for others, the path to hell was paved with good intentions. Its a whole damn spectrum of people!
The reinforcement (pseudo conclusion)-
Perhaps with time, I will be able to understand that pure chance determines the passage of us through our lives, for there are many things that we do and do unconsciously that have an effect on others, this effect throwing you into one of the classes of people that I pointed out before. Good, bad, or just fucked up. Perhaps another way of analyzing this is how memory and the attitude to memory works. I was talking to a Mr Lee, and he said to me that it is very important for me to be positive, and stressed the importance of positive thinking. Perhaps because we (I) do not remember as well as we think we (I) do, and most of the time people do not have reasons to do the things that they do, we might be better off when we are positive, and assume the best of people's actions.
The strike off -
In conclusion, I can say that this is mostly bullshit because in my experience, in matters that have affected me the most, in matters that have caused me the most pain, the biggest waste of my time, and the biggest impact on me as a person, I have realized that for those matters, people did what they did on purpose, and it was all premeditated, and they were out for blood. As for now, and I have to admit that I am still young (relative to Noah the ark builder), I have gotten positive reinforcement for being cautious, and not assuming the best. I have gotten negative reinforcement when I assumed everything was A-okay.
To end-
I stand by the fact that I have seen beauty in the most socially unacceptable looking people, and I have seen the devil in the most angelic faces.
It has been ages since I have had the time and the mental clarity to think about what I am doing, and more importantly, where I am headed. I just spent a weekend with the parents, and I decided that that was by far one of the hardest things that I do, and also, one of the hardest things that I have not yet accomplished. As hopeless as that sounds, I think that the reason that am unable to move on is that though I do not remember as well as others, I understand the reason as to why people do things. And on top of that, if they do not have a reason to do the things that they do, I assign them the most probable reason that they might have had. In turn, considering that most people do not have reasons to act the way that they do, naturally they are assigned the worst possible reason. That said, there are many who have crossed my path that this does not hold true for. Some are just fucked up pure and simple, while for others, the path to hell was paved with good intentions. Its a whole damn spectrum of people!
The reinforcement (pseudo conclusion)-
Perhaps with time, I will be able to understand that pure chance determines the passage of us through our lives, for there are many things that we do and do unconsciously that have an effect on others, this effect throwing you into one of the classes of people that I pointed out before. Good, bad, or just fucked up. Perhaps another way of analyzing this is how memory and the attitude to memory works. I was talking to a Mr Lee, and he said to me that it is very important for me to be positive, and stressed the importance of positive thinking. Perhaps because we (I) do not remember as well as we think we (I) do, and most of the time people do not have reasons to do the things that they do, we might be better off when we are positive, and assume the best of people's actions.
The strike off -
In conclusion, I can say that this is mostly bullshit because in my experience, in matters that have affected me the most, in matters that have caused me the most pain, the biggest waste of my time, and the biggest impact on me as a person, I have realized that for those matters, people did what they did on purpose, and it was all premeditated, and they were out for blood. As for now, and I have to admit that I am still young (relative to Noah the ark builder), I have gotten positive reinforcement for being cautious, and not assuming the best. I have gotten negative reinforcement when I assumed everything was A-okay.
To end-
I stand by the fact that I have seen beauty in the most socially unacceptable looking people, and I have seen the devil in the most angelic faces.
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